A) the super baba deluxe taveez joke
will not help you if
1) setep in front of a train
2) count moeny if front of a goonda
3) Make fun of your wife's weight.
4) GIve money to Satyam Raja.
5) Protection from bird, swine or any other flu.
6) A politicians wrath if you throw a chappal at him
8) Help you access savita bhabhi despite the ban.
8) Help you look good despite your natural looks.
B) YOU KNOW YOU ARE MIDDLE AGED WHEN
1) Your TV goes from convex to flat but your belly goes from flat to convex.
2) All the deserters have fled and left you with no hair/ Hair disappears from the top of your head and starts appearing in strange places.
3) You hardly notice how how your new secretary is.
4) The nagging of your wife starts to sound romantic.
5) You get a big car to bolster your sagging muscles/ego.
6) Your idea of an adventure is a trip to the nearest resort.
7) You realise that your smart stock market investment has gone up in smoke.
8) You do not know even half the features of your new cellphone.
9) Your kids are humiliated by you talking to their friends.
10) YOur computer has become smarter than you.
11) You nod off during lovemaking.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE GETTING OLD WHEN
1) You need adult diapers.
2) You cannot even understand the multifunction TV remote anymore.
3) Your doctor stars singing the "Money, Moeny, moeny..." song every time you visit.
4) You can do a vertuluquist act using your flase teeth.
5) Your cellphone has become smarter than you.
6) Going to the bathroom and coming back is becoming an adventure.
7) Your joints make enough noise to make your inot a one man band.
8) You start chasing girls again.
9) You crave for delicacies but all you can eat is dal khichdi.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A DOG LOVER WHEN
1) Your kid stays in a kennel but your dog sleeps with you.
2) You start looking like your dog.
3) Your ex-wife got it all, but you retained the dog.
4) You cancel your date with Katrina because your dog is sick.
5) You explain that your dog bit her because her nickname is "Kat"
6) Your bathroom has more dog care products than human beauty products.
7) YOur dog's birthday party is the talk of the town.
8) You start peeing like your dog.
9) You need to get de-flea.
10) The dog gets branded food even though all you get is Vada-Pav.